The Myths of Ed Parker’s Kenpo Karate!

Kenpo History Sort of a Mess

Kenpo Karate is one of the most popular martial arts in the world, and the history is, to put it lightly, a mess.

There are three men who brought Kenpo to the streets of America. These are James Mitose, William ‘Thunderbolt Chow, and Ed Parker.

James Mitose learned the art at a temple in Japan. Except, there is no temple there. The area is the home of kosho sect of the Yoshida clan, so maybe. Except…when you think about it, would there be much significance if your instructor learned Karate at a Baptist church somewhere in Illinois? 

Yes, there are differences in culture, and there is a potential zen aspect to it all, but churches are basically meeting places.

The second man in this lineage is William ‘Thunderbolt’ Chow. Professor Chow claimed that he originally learned martial arts from his father, a Buddhist priest. Except, there are no records of his father as a priest. And how does that tie in with the Kenpo he learned from James Mitose?

The third man in this saga is Edmund Parker.

Parker brought Karate to the mainland, began teaching  martial arts while at Brigham Young University. Except, he is said to have taught his students all he knew – he was only a brown belt – and when he went home and tried to get more to teach…Professor Chow wouldn’t teach him anything because he had been instructing without permission!

Now, there are a lot more sordid details to this story. There are fights and arguments and people slandering one another, and the reader might think, at this point, the this writer is writing black headlines just to sell an article. Except…the real problem here is not the three men, it is the students learning their kenpo karate martial art.

People seem to need to bolster themselves up, to give themselves airs, to make themselves sound more important than they are. 

So when Mitose says, in an offhanded remark, ‘Yes, my father used to show me tricks when I was a kid. We were living next to a church then, and we would roll around on the grass in the side yard. Lot of fun…’ the student bows deep and realizes that his instructor studied at a zen temple, was beaten with a bamboo rod for dozing, and had to go through rigamarole that would make Gordon Liu envious.

And when Thunderbolt Chow says, ‘Yes, my father had dreams of being a priest, talked about it often. Priests know really great martial arts, you know,’ the student holds his finger aloft as the lightening strikes him, and knows that he studying ancient and arcane mysteries written down in scrolls dating back to the time of Buddha.

And when Parker says, ‘My instructor didn’t have any more to teach me,’ the student catches his breath and claps his hands together, for obviously his instructor has surpassed his instructor, and the student is the real beneficiary of all this light and goodness.

Yes, there are people who spread rumor and prevarication to make themselves look good, but it is up to the student to be discerning and find out the real truth…and, there is a lesson to be learned here.

The lesson is that man learns best from his mistakes. He learns a little bit from doing something well, but he learns A LOT from messing up. And these three men, James Mitose, William ‘Thunderbolt’ Chow, and Ed Parker, they were human, and they messed up.

So, are we going to make them saints and pretend they made no mistakes? Or are we going to look extra hard at their mistakes and learn, truly learn, from them?

The author began studying Kenpo Karate in 1967. He has written a perspective of Kenpo called ‘How to Create Kenpo.’ In that three volume series he offers a unique perspective of Kenpo. Subscribe to his blog at MonsterMartialArts.com

Martial Arts and a Hurricane!

Republished More Martial Arts Books!

You guys ever been in a hurricane?
I live in Clearwater,
and we had our second hurricane in two weeks
and, man, it was a HOOT!

First,
is there a hurricane martial arts out there?
I’ve read theories of swinging the arms in circular motions,
and how you have to mentally be the eye of the storm,
and, of course, lots of techniques named things like
‘hurricane fists!’

If you know of one,
let me know.
I’ll look into it for an article.

Second,
to be in a hurricane is incredible experience.

Here’s the set up…
the news media goes crazy trying to scare you.
You’re all going to die!
You have to leave your home!
There will be no emergency services
when you almost die
and there won’t be any food!
And on and on and on.

So,
I ignore the naysayers.
They are all idiots.
I get gas for my car,
stock up on water and food,
have a way to cook when the electricity goes out.
Then I sit back and watch the roads jam up.
And the shelves empty.
And, of course,
the people on TV are going crazy trying to scare you.

Here’s the actual fact…
The wind goes up to 30 or 40 MPH
spatters of rain.
The lights flicker.
The people on 
TV tell you you are going to die
and they won’t even find your body!

Then the wind raise up to 50 or 60, with 75 to 80 gusts.
The carport starts banging,
so I go out and tie it down with a garden hose
and run my car over the hose.
End of emergency.

Things start slamming into the house,
it’s time to go to the shookie.
A shookie (sp?) is a little brick shithouse.
It is designed for hurricanes and laughs at them.
I have a bed set up in there,
water,
lights and books.
I call my family on my cell phone
in the middle of the hurricane.
They are all crying and whining and
wailing and sobbing.
AL, YOU’RE GOING TO DIE!
I ask them if they’ve been watching the news.
Yep.
Poor fools.

A few hours the wind dies down
and I go back in the house and watch TV,
and the news people talk about bridges out
and pets abandoned and…
they can’t scare you anymore
so they try to make you sad.
Idiots.

Now,
in all honesty,
if I thought the hurricane was a big one
and it really was going to hit me square on
I’d have left,
or at least gone into the shookie earlier.
I’ve lived through four or five hurricanes now,
and they are scary,
but unless they hit you dead on,
or you live in a cardboard box,
nothing to worry about.

I advise that you do your homework,
however,
before you do what I do,
before you live through one.

But,
you want to know the truth?
I’ve lived through some incredible martial arts training.
I know when to be scared,
and when to laugh.
I even know when to laugh when scared!

So that’s my adventure,
and the real news is that I’ve got about 9 or 10 books republished.
I have included a big section below with links.
Note that Amazon is publishing me again,
but through third parties.
Also note that other book stores are picking me up.
If enough people order through Barnes and Noble
they’ll probably put it in their brick and mortar stores.

Okay,
guys and gals,
get ready for the next hurricane and…
PRACTICE THOSE MARTIAL ARTS!

and try this link…
HIDDEN TECHNIQUES OF KARATE
Barnes & Noble
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/hidden-techniques-of-karate-al-case/1146377079

It’s a heck of a book that goes into a LOT of stuff.

Al

PS ~ you should sign up for the blog at
https://alcase.wordpress.com

It’s expensive to pay Mailchimp and I want to cancel it.

Don’t forget to check out the interview
https://anchor.fm/dale-gillilan/episodes/S1E10—Al-Case-e12e3np

THE LAST MARTIAL ARTS BOOK
Amazon

Barnes and Noble
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-last-martial-arts-book-al-case/1146217369?ean=9798227617200

ADVANCED TAI CHI CHUAN FOR REAL SELF DEFENSE!
Amazon

ADVANCED TAI CHI CHUAN FOR REAL SELF DEFENSE!
Thriftbooks
https://www.thriftbooks.com/w/advanced-tai-chi-chuan-for-real-self-defense/53758888/?srsltid=AfmBOoqJyWkLdO18y0RFUxGoTb3CDXCgAXTk-VB_hvu2NHQwKZOqPBmK#edition=71844464&idiq=72002772

FIVE MARTIAL ARTS!

HOW TO FIX KARATE! (1)
Amazon

HOW TO FIX KARATE! (1)
Thriftbooks
https://www.thriftbooks.com/w/how-to-fix-karate-book-one/53863237/?srsltid=AfmBOooDYRdXJmWmsSkzxxtHX9PDU2c6L1kFl2cSe0tH0MWpwhjvqBk5#edition=71905055&idiq=72156439

HOW TO FIX KARATE! (2)
amazon

HOW TO FIX KARATE! (2)
bookshop
https://bookshop.org/p/books/how-to-fix-karate-book-two-al-case/21839401

BLACK BELT YOGA
amazon

BLACK BELT YOGA
Barnes & Noble
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/black-belt-yoga-al-case/1121852191

THE BOOK OF MATRIXING
https://www.amazon.com/s?k=THE+BOOK+OF+MATRIXING&crid=306WX8EKZIXJE&sprefix=the+book+of+matrixing%2Caps%2C167&ref=nb_sb_noss

THE BOOK OF NEUTRONICS

THE BOOK OF NEUTRONICS
BooksaMillion
https://www.booksamillion.com/p/Book-Neutronics/Al-Case/9798227766922?id=9287395896456

HIDDEN TECHNIQUES OF KARATE
Barnes & Noble
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/hidden-techniques-of-karate-al-case/1146377079

HIDDEN TECHNIQUES OF KARATE
Amazon

American Kenpo Karate Problems!

The Things That Went Wrong With American Kenpo Karate

Here’s a short article on some of the things that happened Kenpo Karate, and made it less than it could be. If you disagree, leave a comment and detail why. Have a great work out! Al

I walked into my first American Kenpo Karate dojo back in 1967. This was the Rod Martin variation of Tracys Kenpo, which was an offshoot of Ed Parker Kenpo Karate. Therein is the first problem with American Kenpo.

It grew too fast. In the orient teachers didn’t teach until they had a minimum of a decade of experience, had studied under a variety of teachers and had learned a variety of martial arts styles. We were borning senseis every three years, which is how long it took to make a black belt back then.

Of course, there is also the problem of which kenpo is the true kenpo? Ed Parker, you see, developed five different kenpos. If you learned an earlier version, is it now considered…less than kenpo?

And, this bring us to the fact that there are variations on the variations. There are people who have evolved combat kenpo and tournament kenpo and MMA kenpo, and so on. It seems there are as many kenpos as there are people studying it.

I first became aware of this problem, too many variations, while putting together Monkey Boxing, which, in one sense, is my version of kenpo, or at least as close as I can come to a kenpo. I had studied the version of a version of it way back when, then I picked up Larry Tatum Kenpo, and I had some of the kenpo connection material, then I came across rather massive instruction manuals on Olympic kenpo, and I believe I had two other versions of the art.

As I went through the endless techniques I saw how the changes were sometimes small, and sometimes large, but always unique to the person making the changes. Now, to be sure, every art should be an expression of the individual, and kenpo does seem suited to this. Still, it would be nice to have a specific set of concepts, and maybe a list of techniques that would standardize the kenpo field before individual martial arts masters expanded it with their own variations.

In the end, I boiled the techniques of five complete arts, with a couple or three partial arts, down to forty techniques. I am sure there will be some who shake their heads at this. After all, how can one summate over 500 techniques, and all the evolutions thereof, with but 40 techniques?

Well, I offer no excuse, I merely invite you to try your own hand at collecting sufficient variations that you might have a complete overview of the art. Then, start organizing the data. It will be difficult, definitely a number nine headache, but you might find yourself a true master of American Kenpo Karate.

Al Case, the greatest martial arts writer of all time (nearly 2 million words in print), is at Monster Martial Arts. You can examine his 40 technique version of American Kenpo Karate there. Make sure you pick up his free ebook on Matrixing, and sign up for the newsletter.

The Sorta Mixed Up History of Kenpo Karate

A Book on Five Martial Arts!

Three things today!

First, more books republished.
There’s a list of them at the bottom of this newsletter.

Second, I’m back on linkedin.
Somebody stole my site
and I had to jump through hoops,
but it looks like it is under my authorship once again.

Third,
here’s an article I wrote a while ago,
which has not been available
except through buying
The Biggest Martial Arts Lesson of All!
which is a ten volume collection of my articles.
Lord,
I’m going to have to republish the whole ten volumes!
But,
enjoy this one,
and I’ll be putting them in the newsletter.

Here go…

Hey Mate! What’s Yer Kenpo System?

Maybe you remember that great scene in Enter the Dragon where the bad guy asks ‘What’s yer style’ of Bruce Lee? As over the top as that statement appears, it points up the differences of arts, and how confusing such a thing as lineage can be. In no art is this as true as in the art of Kenpo.
Many people think Ed Parker created the style of Kenpo, but he actually only popularized it. And, to be honest, he more than likely added to the confusion of the art. He created something like five different versions, and he drew from Karate and Kung Fu and whatever happened to be on his mind that day.

Kenpo got its start in Japan. There is some confusion as to the correct spelling, some people saying Kenpo, and some saying Kempo. Kenpo usually refers to martial arts stemming from China, and Kempo refers to the more Japanese oriented arts.

There is confusion on this point as there is not agreement. Further, there is not always common lineage. That said, Kenpo, although believed to mean ‘Fist Law,’ is actually ‘Quanfa,’ which means Kung Fu.

The main types of the Kenpo in the USA come from James Mitose. Master Mitose is sometimes a controversial teacher, for he was tried and convicted of murder and extortion. He served his time in Folsom Prison.

Mr. Mitose taught William Chow, who taught Ed Parker. Mr. Parker, as has been described, popularized the art of Kenpo. Students of Mr. Chow include Adriano Emperado, Ralph Castro, Sam Kuaho, and others.

Names of the arts taught by these people include Shaolin Kenpo, Kajukenpo, American Kenpo, Kara-Ho Kempo, and many other arts. There is an abundance of secondary students who were taught by these people. Kenpo has also continued to grow conceptually, drawing from many other arts for kata, self defense applications, and so on.

Though Kenpo grew at a tremendous pace, and though the lineage is sometimes difficult to follow, as is the art itself, there is much value in it. Many people ‘wet their feet’ in the convenient ‘Strip Mall Dojos,’ and then continue their studies elsewhere. Still, to define the true system of kenpo, and to list the roots and influences that resulted in that art can be a daunting task.

Matrix Kung Fu…Monkey Boxing, simplifies and condenses Chinese Kenpo Karate. Head on over over to Monster Martial Arts and make sure you pick up a free book while you’re there.

HAVE A GREAT WORK OUT!

Al

PS ~ you should sign up for the blog at
https://alcase.wordpress.com

It’s expensive to pay Mailchimp and I want to cancel it.

Don’t forget to check out the interview
https://anchor.fm/dale-gillilan/episodes/S1E10—Al-Case-e12e3np

You can find the following books on such places as Thriftbooks, Barnes and Noble. If you can’t find them there they will be on Amazon.

The Last Martial Arts Book
A book on Nine Square Diagram Boxing. You won’t need another martial art after this one! Five hours of video!

Advanced Tai Chi Chuan for Real Self Defense!
Another book on Nine Square Diagram Boxing.

How to Fix Karate! (1)
Analyzes and presents the original self defense techniques of Karate! Five hours of video between book one and two.

How to Fix Karate! (2)
Analyzes and presents the original self defense techniques of Karate! Five hours of video between book one and two.

Five Martial Arts
The forms, two man forms for five different arts, shows how the arts progress from one to another.

Black Belt Yoga
Arranges the asanas in the correct order. Makes the art quickeer and easiere to learn.

The Book of Matrixing
Includes three books describing exactly what Matrixing is and how to use it. This is the science behind the martial arts.

The Book of Neutronics
Includes five books which describe exactly how Neutronics works. This is the science behind the science of matrixing.

MORE COMING!

Back in the Beginning of Kenpo…

A Bit of Kenpo History

I began studying Kenpo in 1967. 

It was so unknown that it was called Kenpo Karate so it could be identified with the art of Karate. Not that that many people knew what karate was.

Kenpo was born in Japan. There are many lineages, but the specific Kenpo that is so widely known these days came from James Mitose, Thunderbolt Chow, Ed Parker, and finally, an instructor near you.

Martial Arts were not studied widely at the time, and usually it was fellows who were tough, who looked forward to the street fight, who studied them.

Kenpo came from Okinawan Karate and Japanese Jujitsu. There were other sourcss, many and varied, but the American style Kenpo you might study was likely based, at least in the beginning, on these arts.

Right from the outset Americans realized that Kenpo could be marketed more easily through tournaments, so we studied our freestyle rabidly, and we looked forward to the weekend trips.

For such a violent art, the participants at these tournaments proved to be a polite bunch. Schools were located a distance apart and there wasn’t much competition. Instructors actually looked forward to seeing each other, to comparing notes, and even learning a ‘secret’ technique or two.

And, outside of school, fights did happen. Proud warriors, Kenpo stylists, all martial artists, were happy to step up to a challenge, take umbrage at a veiled insult, trade fists with a goon.

We were more rabid back then. We didn’t do ten or twenty kicks and think we were done, we would do a couple of hundred and chide ourselves for being lazy. We would do forms by the hour. See if we could do 60 forms in an hour.

In short, we would exhaust ourselves. We would go for a run, do some weightlifting, and then freestyle for a couple of hours in class, and know that we were doing it right.

Mistakes? We made a ton of them. But over time we fixed them; the martial arts tend to be self fixing; the turn of the foot, the line of the wrist, the physics of the universe corrected us and were our teachers.

And now, near fifty years later, all we wish is one thing: to do it all again. To do Karate and Kenpo, to throw and kick and punch to our hearts content.

And we feel sorry for all those people who quit early, or who were born too late, or who were just too lax in their training to really find the truth: You are what you do, that is your measure, and that is your worth.

If you want a REALLY good book on Kenpo, consider ‘How to Create Kenpo’ by Al Case. It has the real history, the one you don’t hear much about, plus a section on how to do forms, plus 150 kenpo techniques, thoroughly analyzed so that you can be the best Kenpoka you can be. That’s How to Create Kenpo. The hard work is up to you.

SPECIAL NOTE: How to Create Kenpo went out of print, but it is due to be republished in the very short future.

EXTRA SPECIAL NOTE: Here is a website with the nasty history behind Kenpo. The Man Who Killed Kenpo. The comments are truly amazing!

Don’t forget to join the blog.

 

Republishing the Book of Five Martial Arts!

A Book on Five Martial Arts!

Okay,
just republished ‘Five Martial Arts.
It’s on Amazon at

Five Martial Arts!

You’ll see the basic house forms from Matrix Karate,
the two man forms from Shaolin Butterfly
and from Butterfly Pa Kua Chang.
The lines from Tai Chi Chuan
and the basic training moves from Monkey Boxing.

This is a a hefty book with 164 pages and 300 illustrations

It’s also a nifty look at how I progressed from soft to hard,
included fighting techniques, and so on.

Most important, it’s easy to do.
It will change how you look at and do your martial arts.

I’ll keep you updated as to when new books come out!

HAVE A GREAT WORK OUT!

Al

PS ~ you should sign up for the blog at
https://alcase.wordpress.com
or
http://www.monstermartialarts.com

It’s expensive to pay Mailchimp and I want to cancel it.

Don’t forget to check out the interview
https://anchor.fm/dale-gillilan/episodes/S1E10—Al-Case-e12e3np

The Last Martial Arts Book

Advanced Tai Chi Chuan for Real Self Defense!

How to Fix Karate! (1)

How to Fix Karate! (2)

Five Martial Arts

Using Matrixing to Heal in the Martial Arts!

Healing Method in the Martial Arts

Good morning!
Just had a wonderful hurricane here in Florida.
The newscasters said we would be washed into the sea.
But it was just a nice, clean, refreshing breeze,
a bit of rain,
and a lot of laughter at the doomsayers.

First…
I received a wonderful win from Ryan.
In it he says,
‘I imagine that’s all pretty obvious to you…’
You would be surprised how much is not obvious to me.
And I LOVE it when somebody takes Matrixing
beyond my vision and imagination.
Here’s his win,
and I hope he sparks a few of you…

Howdy Al!

I have already studying the Master Instructor text, so I have found great success with Force and Flow (tension and release to stretch and tear my interior scar tissue gently, then wash it clean from the area with soft movement), and Matrixing ensures that I find unexpected gaps in my posture and recovery.

You might be interested to know that I’ve created a whole Art focused on active healing and stretching of a target subject by integrating my past Chinese Medicine, Western Neurology, and Massage training into the Matrix forms, and imagining that you are operating on a “battlefield” instead of against a single training partner.

The battlefield is the partner’s internal tension and stagnation, and their mind is on your side, but the Force components of their organs and tissues resist or flee or absorb your Force directions, unless you can set up Flow chains through tension relationships.

I imagine that’s all pretty obvious to you – the most awesome thing I’ve gotten from Matrix Martial Arts is the symbolic language to really understand and contextualize my knowledge, increasing transfer speed as well as learning.

I hope you have a great workout!
Ryan Owens
Thank Ryan,
you made my day!

And,
second,
I have more books republished.
Thus far I have

The Last Martial Arts Book

Advanced Tai Chi Chuan for Real Self Defense!

How to Fix Karate! (1)

How to Fix Karate! (2)

Five Martial Arts! should be up soon.

Now, the big surprise is that they are appearing on Amazon. If you can’t find them on the net, try Amazon. And be aware that sometimes it takes a couple of days for the ordering links on Amazon to start working.

And, if you have these books, I sure would appreciate a five star rating. Since these books are published by other companies, and distributed through Amazon, I have lost all my good ratings.

I’ll let you know as I publish more books…

And…last thing. I’m going to be republishing some of my older articles on the blog. They haven’t been seen for years, so I hope you enjoy them!

HAVE A GREAT WORK OUT!

Al

Don’t forget to check out the interview
https://anchor.fm/dale-gillilan/episodes/S1E10—Al-Case-e12e3np

Find the True Martial Art

The True Martial Arts

The Secret of the Martial Arts is how to achieve Awareness. The Secret of All Life is how to achieve Awareness. Thus, the Secret of Life is within you, and all you have to do is figure out how to grow awareness.

This is such an easy thing, so simple, and yet people overlook it. People think that they will be better martial artists if they just work out more, build their bodies, can beat up the other fellow. Nothing could be further from the truth; this is actually diametrically opposed to the truth of themselves as martial artists.

Yes, muscles should be used and grown, but only to a certain degree. They are important only to the degree that they enable one to make themselves aware. One should work the body to make it larger and stronger, but use it to achieve awareness of what the muscles are and are doing.

Yes, forms are important, but only to the degree they enhance awareness. As one does forms one becomes aware of how to move the body. Eventually, with correct practice, one will transcend the normal ways of moving the body and discover whole new concepts of motion.

Yes, martial arts applications are important, but only to the degree that they bring awareness of how to deal with the problems presented by an attacker. One discovers, through martial arts techniques, that the real problem has to do with analyzing and handling incoming forces. This makes one into a more aware being.

Yes, freestyle is important; the combative disciplines wouldn’t be real if they weren’t combat ready. However, the big problem is that people start to love combat for the sake of combat, and not as a method for becoming more aware of how to use the body…even under stress. This is called the Joy of Combat, and is contrary to the real path of the true martial art.

The real key is that one should be learning the martial arts as a discipline to explore ones own self. When one loves combat more than learning they are not learning the art. When one engages in combat to beat the other person, they will never uncover the true spirit of themselves.

The eastern combat disciplines are a key, and the whole body is the lock. Do the martial arts and unlock the bodies true potential. Still the mind and discover the spirit that is the truth of you.

Check out The Master instructor Course at MonsterMartialArts.com. Make sure you subscribe to the newsletter.

 

The First Martial Arts Master!

Were the Martial Arts Really Born this Way?

Joe Blow goes to war, rolls in the mud a lot, manages to survive, and he comes out of the wars with a couple of techniques that worked, that actually saved his life. Maybe pushing the butt of his spear for a horse impalement, maybe ducking when somebody sliced sideways at his head, maybe stepping to the side if they sliced down, and, oh, BTW, stick quick after the other guy misses.

So Joe Blow survives, gets a bunch or ribbons, which are a lot cheaper than a pension, and is pronounced a hero.

Unfortunately, when poor Joe goes home he doesn’t have any way of making money.

But the kids in his village are all impressed, and they keep asking him stupid questions like, “How did you survive the battle of Bloody Gap?”

Which battle he survived by being conked on the head and sleeping through it, then waking up in time for the general to come by and think he’s the last man standing. That was good for a really big, red ribbon.

But kids keep asking and asking, and, finally, in a moment of frustration, he throws a bozo kid on the ground, sticks his knife right to the kid’s throat, and says, “Like this!”

Now, the kid, being stupid, doesn’t realize that he’s pushed Joe to the breaking point, he is just aware that he has sampled all the violence and glory that he missed out on. And he gets up and says, “Wow! Can you teach me that?”

Disgusted, Joe walks away and throws back, “You don’t have enough money to buy that technique!”
“I got ten dollars!”
Joe stops.
He’s broke, he’s hungry all the time, and this stupid kid wants to pay him ten dollars because….because… “Okay!”

So he teaches the kid the technique. Stupid kid actually nicks him with a knife, so he grabs a stick, tells the kid everybody trains with sticks.

The kid asks why not real weapons, and Joe makes up some gobbledegook about sticks being wood, and wood is mystical, therefore the stick is mystical.

“Wow! Am I learning the Stick Mystical System?”
Moaning on the inside with grief, Joe says, “Sure. Call it ‘Stick-My-Sys-Do.’”

Kid goes away all excited, tells his friends, and the next day Joe has 14 brats squalling to learn Stick-My- Sys-Do.

Joe’s eyes light up like a cash register, and he teaches the kids. But when they complain about being thrown on their butt he sells them pillows to put in their pants. Protective gear, you know.

So Joe teaches his five techniques, and then realizes that he has no more! But those kids have been paying for his beans and brewski, so…so he remembers a guy in the wars who told him about how you roll under the charging horse and slash the belly with a knife. Guy was making it up, but what would a bunch of stupid kids know? Eh?

So he teaches them the mystical and sacred technique Rolling Horse Undies.
Then he figures, he got away with that one, he makes one up. ‘Punch Under the Horse’s Tale.’

Which are quickly followed up by Kicking the Cocos, One Finger Up the Nose, and all sorts of other things.

And if any of the kids get mouthy, or give him a rough time, he just uses one of his real techniques to throw the kid on his, uh, pillow, and stick his knife (he’s allowed to use a real one) in the kid’s throat.

And everybody cheers and yells and wants to learn more.

Now, I know, you think I am bitter and cynical, or even (choke) disrespectful. But, if you have a better idea, feel free to share.

NOTE: I originally wrote this as a Case History for a column in the Inside Karate mag. It never got published, and I finally included it in a series of books.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Al Case teaches real martial arts, not just Wedging the Undies or Punch Under the Horse’s Tale, at his sacred and mystical website … Monster Martial Arts.

Sign up for the newsletter!

The Origins of the Martial Arts!

Where the Martial Arts Came From!

I was working in a factory many years ago, and word got around that I was training in the martial arts. A Philippine co-worker came up to me one day, and he said, “No study martial arts, martial Arts bad…bad, “ then he shook his head and walked away. From this odd beginning I discovered where the martial arts really came from.

As one might expect, I was intrigued by my co-workers attitude, the Philippines were renowned for their martial arts, and so I tracked him down and questioned him further. “Why are the martial arts bad?” I asked him. This is the story he told me.

“One day I decide I learn martial arts, so I go outside and hit tree. I chop like so (he did a vertical chop, as if chopping down on somebody’s forehead), and a I chop and I chop. I chop two hour a day for two year.

“One night my neighbor have wild party, and three in morning I go ask him to stop it. He laughed at me, so I use karate on him. I chop his head and he turn upside down, so I run home and worry I kill him…that why Karate bad!”

I didn’t laugh, because he was serious, he really thought the art was bad, and didn’t understand that his unique ways of self training, and his own lack of control, might have something to do with ‘being bad.’ But his tale led me to wonder where the martial arts came from. I mean, they are the world’s second oldest profession, so where did they come from?

They came into being because somebody wanted to take something away from somebody, and they came from somebody wanting to stop somebody from taking something away from him. This is the same as lawyerism, but applied to the actual hit and punch that occurs when politics breaks down. Eventually, the idea of taking something away from somebody, or protecting your property from somebody reached the levels of armies and weapons of mass destruction.

The idea that what you have belongs to me, and I don’t have to pay you no stinkin’ money…that is where the martial arts came from. And people train to war, and steal money and property and wives and whatever else they covet. And, oddly, as my previous words indicate, the solution to this avarice and misbegotten art is…in the study of the true art.

You study the art to protect yourself, and in that study you discover yourself…you discover your self worth, and the idea that you are honorable and don’t have to fear others, or that they might take from you. On the day that everybody on earth knows the martial arts, on that day the avarice and war stop, and on that day everybody will know where the martial arts come from. They come from within, from the spirit that is you, from the honor that motivates every beat of your heart and every breath you take.

Al Case has 60 years of training in the martial arts. If you liked this article visit MonsterMartialArts.com and subscribe to the newsletter.